Boosting Your Self Esteem
Most people assume self-esteem is the same as self confidence, and although self confidence is related, it is not the same. Self confident people also suffer from low self- esteem.
Boosting self-esteem and self image begins to take shape even before you leave the cradle and is well established by the time you reach 8 years old. By the age of 8 you have already received on average 70,000 negative words some of which are “do not do that” “No you can not” “who do you think you are” and many more. Most of these are run of the mill words which adults attach as important when you are growing up; however, they have an affect on you as a child and the effects can be devastating to your self image and self-esteem.
Once you understand your conditioning you can start to unravel the knots that tied you down and then you can leave them behind.
So how do you stay cool, composed and sustain self-esteem in your environment? Here are some tips you may like to consider as a starting point to self improvement and in boosting self-esteem. To start with, imagine yourself as a dart board, everything and everyone else around you is the dart at one point or another. These darts will take away your self-esteem and pull you down in way you can not image. Do not let them destroy you or get the better of you.
So which one of the four darts should you dodge?
Dart one - Human behavior. Bulldozers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, controllers, naggers and complainers will pose bad vibes for your self-esteem as well as your self improvement. Do not get involved with these people they are not helping you move on.
Dart two - Changing environment. You can not be a green bug on a brown field. Changes will challenge you and test your flexibility and adaptability. This alters the way you think. Changes will make it difficult for a while, and may cause some stress. However, it will help you find ways to boost your self-esteem and help you to move forward.
Dart three - Past experiences. It is alright to get uptight when things go wrong. However, do not let it transform itself into anger. Treat each past experience as a mistake and learn from it. Make the best of a bad situation.
Dart four - Negative worlds. Look at what is around you. Do not wrap yourself up in a negative world. In boosting self-esteem you must learn to look at the positive side. There is always a positive world just as there is a negative world. You need to work with the positive world.
Do you ever think that some people are born leaders or positive thinkers? Well let me give you the answer, they are not. Being positive and staying positive is your choice. Boosting self-esteem and drawing lines for self-improvement is your choice, it is not a rule or a talent. In life it is hard to stay positive especially when things and people around you are pulling you down. However, do not forget life gives you the choice to stay as you are or move on. The way you behave and the way you think is your choice.
Boosting self-esteem will eventually lead to self improvement if you start to become responsible for who you are, what you have and what you do.
So how do you start boosting your self-esteem?
Be positive, be appreciative and never miss an opportunity. By having a positive way of living will help you boost your self-esteem and start you on the road to self improvement and self-growth.
Self-esteem is a part of the human experience. When you feel troubled and you loss your self-esteem you can review the suggestions below and choose the one that is relevant to your situation. These suggestions will help you boost your self-esteem. It is important to be patient with yourself and to remember change takes time it does not happen over-night.
Free yourself: live your life on the basis of what is possible for you and what feels right to you instead of what you or others think you "should" do. Do not be distracted from identifying and fulfilling your own needs, abilities, interests and personal goals. Find out what you want and what you are good at, value these, and take actions designed to fulfill your potential.
Respect your own needs: Recognize and take care of your own needs and identify with what really fulfills you. Respecting your deeper needs will increase your sense of worth and well-being.
Set achievable goals: Establish goals on the basis of what you can realistically achieve, and then work step-by-step to develop your potential. For example, "Anything less than an A in school is always unacceptable" it will invite stress and failure which will knock you self-esteem.
Talk to yourself positively: Stop listening to your "cruel inner critic." When you are doubting and judging yourself, replace such thoughts with self-accepting thoughts, balanced self-assessment, self-supportive direction and positive thoughts.
Test your reality: Separate your emotional reactions, your fears and bad feelings from the reality of your current situation. For example, you may feel stupid, anxious and hopeless about a situation; however, if you think about it, you may still have the ability and opportunity to accomplish something from it.
Experience success: Seek out and put yourself in situations that the probability of success is high. Look for projects which stretch you, however, do not overstretch yourself. "Image" yourself succeeding. Whatever you accomplish let yourself acknowledge and experience success and feel good about it.
Take chances: New experiences are learning experiences which can build self confidence. Expect to make mistakes as part of the process; do not be disappointed if you do not do it perfectly. Feel good about trying something new, making progress and increasing your competence.
Solve problems: Do not avoid problems, face them, and identify ways to solve them or cope with them. If you run away from problems you can not solve, you threaten your self-confidence. Practice making and implementing positive decisions, trust yourself to deal with the consequences. When you assert yourself, you enhance your sense of self, learn more, and increase your self-confidence.
Develop your skills: Know what you can and can't do. Assess the skills you need; learn and practice these. Emphasize your strengths. Focus on what you can do rather than what you cannot. Accept current limitations and live comfortably within them, even as you consider what strengths you might want or need to develop next.
Trust your own opinion: Entertain feedback from others, but do not rely on their opinions. Work on your own values in making decisions and decide how you feel about yourself and what is right for you.
There's nothing wrong with being proud of what you have done, or what you think you can do, or of whom you are and where you come from.
The higher you boost your self-esteem, the more you will like yourself and the more you will accomplish. Small successes give you greater self-confidence, which leads to the pursuit of bigger challenges, and then bigger successes.
Self Esteem Index
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