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Self Esteem Index
Site Index
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Dealing with Low Self Esteem
Trying to function day to day with low self-esteem is like trying to blow up a balloon with a pin hole in it. Low self-esteem can cause you to feel not good enough and you will be constantly putting yourself down.
To put into simply terms, low self-esteem is how you think about yourself and how you compare yourself to others around you. Low self esteem means that you see yourself as a lesser person. This can often be traced back to early childhood experiences, such as criticism, being abandoned, feelings of being unloved or being ridiculed or abused.
Low self esteem can have various signs, these can include feelings of not being good enough, decreased confidence, putting yourself down, not wishing to try new ideas, making no effort to change things, not being assertive, losing your temper, blaming others and constantly bickering.
Low self-esteem feeds on negative thoughts. So do not indulge in self criticism. I do understand it is good to care about others, however, by doing this are you forgetting you own needs, which are just as important?
When you try to be like others, you will lack self-worth and confidence. You are unique and you cannot be someone else. So start to improve how you feel and see yourself, stop criticizing yourself for not being successful, beautiful, slim, or popular with others.
You need to start taking your life and yourself less seriously, start having some fun. Because you fail, it does not mean you are not successful or no good. Everybody fails before succeeding, so do not look at something going wrong as failure, but as a way of learning for next time. |
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Your self-worth and confidence will increase when you start to focus on your needs and desires. You might not believe it, but you have a duty to yourself to live life as you want to. This is not selfish, as long as what you want does not hurt others or prevent them from living their life.
Do not think because you have low self-esteem you are not powerful, strong, better or perfect. The truth is you do not have to be any of these. It is just the opposite, you should concentrate on how human you are, how vulnerable you are, how innocent you are or imperfect you are. You are the same as everyone else; you just need to realize it.
If you are a person that has a healthy self-esteem, you will lead a very different life to someone that has low self-esteem. There is only one thing that separates the two and that is not money, good looks, a good job, a perfect home or a perfect body. The only difference is that the person with a healthy sense of self is more compassionate with themselves.
Let’s look at a person with a healthy self-esteem, they will not be hard on themselves, set unrealistic goals, will not live by unreasonable rules or have expectations for others or themselves. They know they do not have to win every time to feel good about themselves. This is a person that knows they do not have to prove anything to anybody, to have self-worth. This attitude does not make them big headed; on the contrary, it puts less pressure on them so they are able to perform better.
Now lets look at the person with low self-esteem, they will constantly be trying to be better than others (over compensate). This is because deep down they feel they are not good enough the way the person with healthy self-esteem is.
So here are some questions to think about. Why do you think you are not good enough the way you are? Why are you really that bad? (Of course you are not) Self-worth allows you to get rid of these high standards and allows you to recover your self esteem.
Start thinking about yourself differently. Ask yourself what it would be like to be the true you. Once you uncover your true self your low self-esteem will disappear and your self-esteem will return giving you a healthy life style.
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